Saturday, December 23, 2006
torn
Sunday, December 17, 2006
haven been updating for 2 or 3 days le. hands itchy liao. haha. so yea. nothing much happen for the past 2 day. actually. i alr fergot wad i hav done during the past 2 days. if im not wrong. it was just slackin around at home bahs. haha.
so yea. today! 17dec2006. went to play bball. like finally. haha. its been so long since i've played! oh no wrong. its been long since i've EXERCISE! i need da slim down man. my body gettin more n more 'fit' liao. my tat 'yi li' muscle is getting bigger by days. especially with the doha games. eat cookies n den sit back n relax. haha. but luckily. its over now. so no more cookies in the middle of the night! yeah! but here comes another problem. what am i going to do in the middle of the night?!? oh well.. times running out for me to enjoy. i need to get the most out of this few days! blahs.... anyway. after playin bball. went to junhao hse n played mahjong. lost 9bucks there. crap. dun wanna talk about it.
3rd jan. i think i'll just give it a try. maybe if i really dont like it. i'll just move on to poly. i shun think so much now. bcoz i still duno how life there is. i've onli been making 'decision' from all that i've heard. maybe some aint that true. or i may feel different. maybe i'll feel more cmfortable there? yeap. so yar. i'll just give it a try. i'll give my best there. if not no point like going there with the mood of : sian, bored, sucks. i'll have to give my best! nono. i'll have to exceed my best. exceed my limit. n push myself. yeap. people. give me some motivation along the way alrites? =]
patience. learn to keep cool. tats my top 2 priority now! lost my cool in the mahjong session todae. again. damn! it aint easy la.. but i wont give up on this. this is gonna affect my life man. so yea. i must learn them. PATIENCE. COOLNESS.
miss my warcraft! someone please... teach me how to play DOTA! haha. n i need to buck up on my ENGLISH. oh damn.. my post. hahahahahha. its dun look english to me. at all. rrraaaahh!
take care peeps! =)
torn
Thursday, December 14, 2006
got posted to pioneer. i wanna go ST. ANDREWS la... idiot. too stoopid i guess. damn. so yea. am i going? should i go? will i be wasting time? will i score in my A's? can i survive 2years of 'prelim days'? oh fcuk. so many so many questions. n its all the same question. im lazy to blog. its the same old stuffs anyway. just read the previous post and you'll know what im confused over.
fahrun came online just now. n he's learning black pepper sauce. lets just all wait for his come back party huh.. blahs.
damn. i need to learn to keep my cool.
the more i learnt about you. n him. the more heartbreak i get. n the more failure i feel. people sae. when you like someone. its good enough just to know that the person is happy. its not necessary to own that person. but how many people is kind enough to do that? humans are selfish. im one of them.
torn
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
okays. its 7 now. n im here bloggin! im such an early bird arent i? haha. nahs. haven been sleepin much. slept for 2 hrs n i woke up. am at fahrun hse now.. n he still haven pack his bag. i think he'll go crazy later. o doubt he'll have enough time especially when we still hav some santa clausing to do. but nvm ah. at least his not sleeping now. doing some imprt stuff now. so for now. im not gonna disturb him. yeap.
oh well. emailed carrie last night. n so was so lucky that she read it out. now the whole singapore knows that FAHRUN ANDERSON TAN.TAN.MA.MA.LANO is going back to indon to be a cook. haha. n i really hope there's enough medicine there huh.. =x blahs..... lucks monkey!
oh crap. this thingy is suppose da make mi tired n get back to sleep. but im even more awake now. rraaah! nvm. shall stay up and slack ard. im missing home. somehow. im feeling so wrong now. duno y. thats wads keepin me awake now.
im stuck. in the middle of no where.
torn
Saturday, December 09, 2006
oh well. came here n thrash things out a little. if not everything just rush here n there in my small little brain.
is going to jc really a better option? i've got no confidence for my o's at all. let alone A's in the future. but i wanna get into a uni. i wanna get a degree. i wanna take photo with the square hat. i wanna enjoy the graduating assembly. i want to get good money for my job! yar yar. everyone gonna tell me tat we can get into a uni after graduating from poly. but its just a small percentage of people. very small. n these people r normally those who scored well during o's n dun wanna go jc. n get into a poly. this means they'r the clever people. but im certain tat im not. n put me in tat environment. im sure i'll just keep playin n playin. i need pressure on me to make me move n get on with STUDIES! i dun have self-discipline. at all. i guess.
so yup. we can go to overseas uni.. nothing wrng with tat. but im a person who cant be alone. im no where near the word independent. far off. believe me. i haven tried eatin alone outside. i haven been to shop for stuffs alone before. even if its for simple stuff like pencil or wad.. i'll drag someone along with me. so going overseas alone is definately out for me.
tats bout it. lucky i got this blog to crap. if not i guess my head wuld be in pieces by now.
till next time...
i got dao-ed. twice. busy? rrrraaaahhhh. blahs.
torn
Friday, December 08, 2006
well. its 230am now. n i cant seem to fall asleep. so i shall come here n waste some time n try n tire myself out. been to a few people's blog. everyone is like makin a reflection for the past year. or rather for their sec sch life. maybe i shall copy n hope it'll waste quite some time here.
sec1 orentation camp. came in to dunearn sec sch. posted to 1e2. where the people are all so nice! forgot whom i first sat with. i tink its wesley. cos he olwaz mention this. but honestly. i dun really rmb. so yup.. orentation camp went thru n we got to know each other. form teacher was ms michelle tham back den. but now since she's married. she's mrs michelle koh. she's a wonderful maths teacher. n thanks to her. i got my foundation right n tats whr i built on. sci teacher was mdm leow. how fierce can she be when she bring us to the chem lab?! omg. a stare from her n the whole class will quiet down. tats how scary she was! chi teacher was mr koh. haha. the old man tat olwaz act like a kid? i guess so. he olwaz talk bout 'yellow' stuffs. n his lesson is olwaz filled with laughters. but despite all these. i still gain alot from his lesson. not those stuffs. but chinese stuffs! promoted to sec2 n all of us got promoted as a class. chi teacher chnged to tbc. freak tcher. caused my chi to dropped a little. maths teacher also chnged. to ms soh. well. she aint tat interestin but she got her job done. literature lesson. ms au. the best sleepin lesson. take up the book tat has a character named 'tianbao' inside. n you sleep. tats wad i did for the whole year! well. i stil managed to pass my major lit exams. at this point of time. i alr somehow had a few friends to hang ard with. vincent. bryan. yimian. darrell. zhenming. wesley. we'll olwaz spend time together. n to think of it now. i seriously miss the time when we go to the bball court n played soccer during our recess. we'll olwaz end up sweatin n rushin to class. i miss those days! sec2 was my 'prime' bball days. was made vice-capt by the coach until my hand got fractured. yishun no14? yup. its him. i cried when the nurse told me i wont be do to have serious sports for the nxt 2-3mnths. competition was so near! how can i miss this period!! tears rolled down. mr yeoh saw everything. guess he knew tat i really wanted to fight on n worked hard. n he allowed me to continue to be in the team. hoping that i would recover in time n take part if the team proceeds to the national level. but well. we din make it thru the zonal. but nonetheless. i loved our team spirit. n i miss the time when we shouted OOOSSSHHH together. n the sentence that someone said before our last match in the zonal compt. 'c'mon. lets do this together. we'll win as a team n lose with honour. we'll do this for andy.' it was then tat i truely understand what team spirit was all about. it really moved me. but i couldn't do much for the team. with one hand. i passed them water. towels. n did everything i could. they too. gave their best. the spirit in the game. i will never forget.
so well. got promoted to sec3. i guess thats when i know of an idiot name fahrun anderson tanmalano. up till now. i still cant figure out how i know him. i think its thru weijie bahs. the track n field gang. so well. our gang became bigger. our soccer craze increased. introduced to this peer tutoring thingy. which made all of us grumbled non-stop. it replaced the standard tutorial. n the school introduced a student leadership board to takeover the student council. this move gave the student leaders more 'power' n recognition. went thru the camp n interview. they were choosing people for the top13 post in the board. n well. being such a un-serious kid. i wasnt chosen for any of them. so i continued to be a prefect. had all those duties that i olwaz find excuse n skipped them. but it was this duties that bond us. the prefects. together. we will olwaz sit together at the stairs on the 3rd level. n we'll olwaz chat there. tats wad we do durin our lower sec too! n when the teacher caught us. we'll sae we'r just askin each other some stuff. n den we'll quickly walk away.
n with the blink of an eye. we got onto sec4. o's reachin us soooo soon. my secondary school life is going to end. at the start of the year. i remember i told myself. work hard n chiong all the way till o's end. n obviously i din make it. began to slack. took chi o's in june. was real scare when the results came out. n tat mr toh. still play with my class n made us the last class to c the results. n to much relief. i got an A for my o's. mock exams reached very very soon. i wasnt really payin much attention n was still in the playin mood. until prelim. i finally realise its time to be serious n start studyin. so yar. brought up books n really studied for my prelims. but i guess it din worked well. l1r5 was 19. pathetic. but i still manage to pull myself up. 1nov came. took my 2nd o level paper! but this time round. i can really feel the 'heat.' i told myself that i will just have to endure this for the nxt 19 days n all will be done. but i couldn't take these. broke down somewhr in the 12th or 13th. gave up studyin. n i mean. gave up. there was this break n i wasnt touchin any books. slack ard. played com. etc. just all except for books. now to think of it. i really regretted. had i spend these time on practising maths sums. i wouldnt be so bothered by my maths now. n blah blahs.. i duno wad was goin thru my mind at that time. but its certainly not the same as whats in my mind now. but its over. no point ponderin over it. n im missing sooo much stuffs during sec4. the time when we play during our pe lesson. oh weelllll.. sec4 life: to be continued....
3mnth course coming up next. will know the result on 14dec. i guess i'll prob get into pioneer. but will i really study? if i flung my A's.. it'll be the end of me. somehow. i'll have to go to poly. tat means i've wasted 2years of my life. but i really wanna get into a uni. n jc will be an easier option to get into one. it'll be hard to progress from poly to uni. but from what i've heard. jc seems sooo stress. the 'standard of living' if like prelim days.. can i survive 2years of this? i doubt i can. i'll just break down n die. so okay. nothing wrng with getting into a poly. but what course am i going to take there? i still dun hav an idea of what i wanna be when i grow.. oh damn! im feeling so... tight? i guess i need some fresh air now. i guess its just bcoz its this topic.
hmm. i would like to thank alot alot of people. vincent. the tall freak whose olwaz there for me. no matter if im down or if im going home. bryan. the super guai lan freak n the eng pro. darrell. the rich kid n clever freak. yimian. the heroin addict n muscular kia. n the most 'loyal' guy. never pangseh anyone of us til now. clare. my best girl friend. who never fails to listen to my bedtime stories n the one who olwaz name me the GIRL. rachel. the girl who olwaz makes me feel young n that i should grow. n recently. this freak is beginning to be important to me. fahrun. the guy who never fails to brighten our day. but dun look down on him. he's real deep. n to all those that has helped me grow. classmates of 2e2 year 2004! the best class i've ever seen n been to. dunearn basketball team. the team really made me learnt lots of stuffs. things like: you cant gain something by just sayin you want. you gotta work real hard n put in your very best for it. talking bout this. i rmb someone so important to me now once said: its not enough to give in your best. you gotta exceed the limit. you have to EXCEED your BEST.
thank you. people.
n its 330 now. im tired. tats all for now..
torn
Thursday, December 07, 2006
wooohoo. the weather so cooling n nice now. thanks to the rain earlier in the mornin. it was so nice tat it made mi sleep till 2+ i guess. sooo nice! if onli singapore experience this type of weather everyday.... but nvm. no complains..
but this weather, aint tat good to me afterall. this olwaz makes me feel down. no reason. it just happens. was talkin wit vin last nite. we conclude tat gals cant be understood. yup. they can be like the weather. we wont know when they'r gonna be nice n when they'r gonna be bad. blahs...
oh hey! 2e2 classmates! we will be going to sentosa either on the 9th or 16th. please approach me for further details....
todae gonna be a cool off day? i guess so. been thinking last night.. n i really regret for wad i have done when i was 13. it was rubbish. things was going so well until i fcuk things up. i cant rmb wad exactly was going thru my mind at that time. but for now. im sure i wont do it again. it was just a childish act. i've learnt.
i duno wad i can do now. maybe its all too late? maybe i cant be forgived for wad i did? im sorry.
torn
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
rraaahhh.. the dedication on 6dec. 9+pm in perfect10. was kinda wrong.. crazy over tat person was meanin MAD. ANGRY. not crazy over her........ so yup. just here da make things clear. it was my mistake. my sentence structure had some problem therefore causing the misunderstandin. haha. so yup.
find the book kite runner!
=]
torn
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
just uploaded a few of the prom nite pics. haha. darr/dada/davinci/illegalbangla/richpig.. is our Mr Personality for year 2006! he is a product from 1e2,2e2 okays! haha. Benjamin was the prom king! he was so shuai please.. recieving electricity wheneva you look at his eyes. haha.
just came home from the e2 chalet.. ben long since we've meet up as a whole class. but i guess we still wasnt a class ytd. quite a few people couldn't make it. but nonetheless. its was still fun i guess. at least for most of the time. n was proud to spend time with Mr Personality.. haha. the chalet was quite big n i guess it was quite value for money. just tat we were given one of the bungalows inside. n there was this disturbin stench. but overall i guess it aint tat bad. spend most of the time playin mahjong for the first dae. n the second dae. we were slackin ard. played pool. bball. captain's ball n bbq! n i guess shaojie will make a good chef? haha. his 'otah chick wing' was cool! ate quite alot at midnight. oh n i was so bad during the bbq.. haha. sorry people! i din help anything! i just sat n ate n crap throughout. was given the task to take care of the ill mr personality la huh.. forgive me! hehe.
hmmm.. how am i goin to spend the rest of my holidays? everybody's workin! except for ME n fahrun. tat illegal worker. i wanna work too! but i cant seem to find a job.the it shop at marina square i guess its gone bahs. hvn called me. but i know haagen daas n coffee bean r hiring people! but sis dun wan me to work there i guess. i wan money! i wanna buy lots n lots of stuffs. slippers! fm2007! blahblahs.. n im goin 3mnth? i duno... im so afraid of the life in jc. everyone's tellin me tat it'll be stress. the 'standard' of living will be like prelim! n i cant imagine myself goin thru 2years of prelim. i'll die! is poly a beta option? i duno!! guess i need to talk to people again.. but everyone's busy with their own stuffs. damn!
i guess i alr know wad im goin to do bahs. its very simple. just giving my very best. full effort n commit myself into this. im not gonna give up so easily! at least not until she ask me to leave n not interact with her. kind of hinted her. but i guess she still doesnt know bahs.. n from the hints. i know tat this will be very very difficult for me. super steep uphill task! but im gonna do it! i can do it!
all i need is a chance to prove myself. guess tats all im askin for. or rather.. tats all i can ask for.. i wont regret wad im goin to do. i'll fight till the day when you feel that im able to replace the whoever person in your heart now.
torn
our very own Mr Personality!! Darrell Lim!!! yyyeeaaahhhhh!
the top3 mr dunearnite!
our very own Mr Dunearnite 2006! Benjamin Wong!!! soo HANDSOME please.. cool! style!
torn
Sunday, December 03, 2006
am at darr hse now. wanted da play WOW. but to tink of it.. it'll be beta for mi to blog? haha. cos im goin chalet! yeeaaahhhh!
err. just watched the pool match. they finally won their away games. n in much style! haha. they won 0-4. one of it is an own goal tho.. but i actually still hav some doubts for them... as the commentator said. pool actually onli had a few shots at goal. n they were lucky enough bcoz it was bellamy. had it been for some other ppl. the scoreline may not b this way le.. n im loving reina!! haha. saved to possible goals.. phew. n anw. arsenal won too. but i guess their goals were controversial? wadeva the spelling. one mayb offside n one mayb diving! lol.. but they won 3-0 tho. well done everyone! stevie rocks! the 3rd pool goal. kuyt scored. wow!!!! stevie's the man!
alrite. enough bout soccer. went to watch this baby prom thingy wit my sis ytd mornin? it was a performance by the singapore symphony orchestral at victoria concert hall. but i guess it aint tat worth it bahs. bcoz much of the show was talkin n talkin by the person. interactive stuffs.. soo end up onli like got 3 proper songs by them? haha. but from the 3songs.. its pretty impressive i guess. haha. how can we not be impress by the singapore orchestral?!
i'll upload the prom pics asap. to be continued........
hmmm. m i really in a state of confusion? mayb i am bahs. i just dun wanna lose the thingy im having now.. n im super afraid of spoiling the life? it aint rite!! but mayb it aint wrng too? i duno.. everything is freakin mi out. n mayb tats wad makin mi so blur? wadeva tat is.. sighs. but i know tat im tryin to start doin things bit by bit. tats wad mr xu n the action kia is tellin mi to do. i feel bad when i send a msg. but probably. i shun be tinkin about the past. its over? rraaahhh.. im lost. tat sums up everything.
torn